Climbing Out of the Abyss – Part 17

September 19, 2015

Steps to heaven

Seven Steps to Heaven

We are surrounded by reminders of the seven steps to Heaven / Enlightenment/ Transformation, but most of us are not really aware of them and how they can help us.

The first of the seven steps to Heaven begin at Hell, in a way. It is represented by Saturn (Satan in Astrotheology) the slowest planet, the limitations of time. ‘Baptism’ – born into our tribe. The ‘Root Chakra’ – our basest survival needs, our ego, self- preservation, where we get caught up in ourselves, habits, addictions, anger, our lower selves. In Alchemy it’s the Lead of self. In Energy it’s the lowest frequency and vibration. It is our ancient and stubborn soul in Spirituality. By letting go of our fear and anger, by looking out for others as well as ourselves, by realizing that there is nothing outside ourselves that can harm or control us except our own vain imaginations, we get to move up to the next level.

Step two is represented by Jupiter, the metal Tin. ‘Communion’ – greater interaction with others, community. ‘We’ rather than ‘I’. The ‘Sacral Chakra’ – when we move up from our ego desires and fears, we find balance between love, money and the power to create. Through using mental exercises and intuition we can seek to let go of repressed feelings that are at the root of all our addictions. With more balanced emotions we go to level three.

Step three is represented by Mars, the metal Iron. ‘Confirmation’ – discovering who we are in the world. The ‘Solar Plexus Chakra’, willpower, the will to live. When we gain insights into our behaviours and how they affect ourselves and others, we learn to assert ourselves without dominating or submitting, we find equality, personal honour, courage, and we move away from materialism and the battles it causes.

Step four is represented by Planet Venus (the glyph is the symbol for life force, the Egyptian Ankh, it denotes a circle over a cross, the triumph of spirit over matter) the metal is Copper. ‘Marriage’ – we become more caring and less manipulative to others. ‘Heart Chakra’-we balance our emotions further, learn our lessons from love and develop greater compassion, forgiveness and empathy. We learn to give unconditionally while respecting our own boundaries.

Step five is represented by Mercury and the metal Mercury. ‘Confession’ – power of speech. ‘Throat Chakra’ – speaking our truth, liberation, creativity, inspiration, expressing our thoughts but balancing speaking with listening, being aware of our inner power without getting caught in the pride of our wisdom, discovering mind over matter.

Step six is represented by the Moon, Silver. ‘Holy Orders’ – being Divinely guided and sharing that knowledge to help others. ‘Third Eye Chakra’ – intuition, free of the ego and instinctual influences, a feeling of connectedness to everyone and everything and seeing how you play your part in affecting the world around you.

Step Seven is represented by the Sun, Gold. ‘Last Rites’ – death to the old ways of living and being in the world. ‘Crown Chakra’ – transformation, a oneness with the universe in which the Divine is experienced. In Alchemy it is the Gold of self, the Philosophers Stone. It is higher consciousness, the highest vibration and frequency. We are in touch with higher guidance, knowingness, enlightenment, bliss, and can fulfill our highest potential.

Part 18 – Interdependence

Paula is an Author / Hypnotherapist / Reiki Healer / Artist / Photographer, in Blessington Co. Wicklow. www.i-want-a-better-life.ie / paulaosullivan1@gmail.com / Phone 086 0848398 All her articles to date are on her blog www.paulaosullivan@wordpress.com

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Climbing Out of the Abyss – Part 16

August 20, 2015

Metaphysical Mind

Your Metaphysical Mind

By Paula O’Sullivan

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.” – Albert Einstein. It took me a long time to realize this myself!

Most of us live our lives day by day creating our reality through the lens of the reasoning mind and our perceptions, which causes us to feel disconnected and separate from everyone and everything else. Have you ever experienced the same situation as another person did, but on talking about your experiences, you noticed that you both had different stories to tell about the same event, causing you to wonder if you were both talking about the same thing? We base our reality mostly on the five senses, which is like taking many pictures of the city you live in, and making up your mind about it, instead of going into the city itself. So the difference between your reasoning mind and your metaphysical mind, is that you also use other aspects like intuition, inspiration, imagination, thoughts and feelings that create a sense of connection with everything else.

Feeling connected to everything else gives us a greater sense of empathy with our world. We see that we are a part of the problems that surround us, and that we are also a part of the solution. It gives us a greater sense of responsibility for the part we play in the whole situation.

We can then become aware of another basic universal principle, that of cause and effect, you reap what you sow.  Each thought we think energetically affects everything around us. If we have repeated dominant thoughts, these in time will affect our behaviour, our actions, and our habits, which will affect those people who interact with us. In turn how we affect those people, will in turn affect the people they interact with. And on it goes.

Most of us are not creating our reality with any kind of awareness, we are unconsciously recreating patterns of behaviours that we perhaps learnt as children. We are on autopilot, reacting to our experiences with our different perceptions. I mentioned this briefly in the part on Core Beliefs. With metaphysics we start creating consciously the kind of world we would like to experience, because with this knowledge comes the awareness that everything returns to sender at some stage. So that everything we send out there, our thoughts, emotions, actions and deeds become the script for our lifes experiences.

Oh I know this may sound way out there for some of you. We haven’t been programmed to think in this way. We have been brought up to believe that our power is external. It comes from other people, situations, material things etc. We were not told that we were also the creators of our day to day reality.

If you want to start using your metaphysical mind, begin by using your thoughts, imagination, intuition, inspiration and emotions in a more positive way. Start with the awareness that everything you think, say and do is affecting someone, somewhere. Now decide what kind of affect you want to be creating. Know that if you are the creator of hassle, drama, suffering, pain etc for others then you are mapping out a future of misery for yourself. Your life experiences will begin to change, when you do!

Part 17 – Seven Steps to Heaven

Paula is an Author / Hypnotherapist / Reiki Healer / Artist / Photographer, in Blessington Co. Wicklow. www.i-want-a-better-life.ie / paulaosullivan1@gmail.com / Phone 086 0848398 All her articles to date are on her blog www.paulaosullivan@wordpress.com


Climbing Out of the Abyss – Part 15

July 10, 2015

Living With Intention

‘Such a simple concept, yet so true, that which we manifest is before us, we are the creators of our own destiny. Be it through intention or ignorance, our successes and our failures, have been brought on by none other than ourselves’ –Garth Stein (Quote)

As a person who in the past liked to blame everything for the way my life wasn’t working out, the overwhelming sense of responsibility I felt, when I discovered that I was actually creating my reality, hit me like a whack to the side of the head!

I became aware of how we can sabotage our lives either consciously or unconsciously. I found that when we are aligned with the Divine Design, our Destiny, we know it in our hearts, and we feel really happy inside, there is no mental conflict.

By learning to live with intention, we can consciously create the kind of story of our lives that we do want to be telling. There are some basic universal principals that are little known, and these are very important if you want to begin to express the Divine idea in your life.

‘As Within, so Without’: as within in your mind and your subconscious mind, then so without in your reality. Look at your life right now, it is a mirror reflection of what is going on in your mind. You focus on lack and financial issues, bingo, here they come! You focus on illness and here it is! Quite distressing isn’t it? And I’m not going to be able to offer you a miracle quick fix, but if you are really eager to change this unhappy reality, quite simply change your focus of thoughts, change the words you are using, the story you are telling, and you will change the emotions you feel, and your reality will mirror back to you these different situations.

There is a sentence in the Bible that refers to ‘if any two of you shall agree, it shall be done’. The usual interpretation of this is, if you can get a likeminded person to be interested in your plans, then it shall manifest, which helps, but there is also another meaning, which is if you can get your subconscious and your conscious mind to agree, then it will manifest really quickly.

Your conscious mind is like the captain of a ship giving the orders, and the subconscious is like the engine of the ship, it just follows orders. You tell it that there isn’t enough, and it says ok, lets create lack! It is the genie in the bottle, it is not the reasoning mind, and it cannot tell the difference between imagination and reality, and your imagination always wins!

How do we get the two minds to agree? We use affirmations continuously that fire us up and that feel right. Read ‘The works of Florence Scovel Shinn’ I highly recommend it. But for now I have found the following affirmation to be extremely effective. ‘Infinite Spirit, open the way for the Divine Design of my life to manifest, let the genius within me now be released, let me now express the Divine idea in my mind, body and affairs, let me see clearly the perfect plan’ (Florence Scovel Shinn affirmation)

Create consciously!

Part 16- Your Metaphysical Mind

Paula is an Author / Hypnotherapist / Reiki Healer / Artist / Photographer, in Blessington Co. Wicklow. www.i-want-a-better-life.ie / paulaosullivan1@gmail.com / Phone 086 0848398 All her articles to date are on her blog www.paulaosullivan@wordpress.com


Climbing Out of the Abyss- Part 14

June 18, 2015

Fear

Overcoming Fear

We are born with only two fears, the fear of falling, and the fear of loud noises. These are there to protect our survival. If we have other fears, we have acquired them though our repeated dominant thoughts, the use of our imagination and through learned behaviour and response.

What is Fear?

Fear is a chain reaction in the brain that starts with a stressful stimulus which then produces the fight-or-flight response. The stimulus could be a spider, or anything else, which is a trigger for the brain to release chemicals, cortisol and adrenalin etc which cause our bodies to prepare to fight or flee. The oxygen in our brains travels very fast down to the heart and lungs area, and makes us breathe faster, blood and oxygen gets pumped into our muscles, arms and legs, giving us the strength to get away and survive.

When we think the same kind of thoughts, we engage our imagination, we produce the same kind of response in our bodies and minds, and we reinforce the fear. It’s a cycle that can’t be broken unless we change something first.

Learned Response

Observe any child, if they hurt themselves, see a spider, etc. They will always look to the nearest adult to see how they respond first, before they respond. This is how we learn how to act, behave and survive in the big world we find ourselves in. Most of us want to fit in and belong, so we mirror the behaviours and reactions of those closest to us. In a way we form a subconscious agreement with these people, that this is the way to react and respond when this stimulus or situation happens. This doesn’t just apply to fears, it also applies to relationships etc. We can find ourselves as adults still playing the same old scripts that we agreed to when we were children, and it becomes our automatic response to things.

So to change this we use a series of steps;

  1. Decide how you want to respond to future stimulus, decide how do you want to react, feel, etc.
  1. Use the Anxiety Breathing Technique (Part 8) on a daily basis to form a new habit in the body to prevent the stress response from triggering physiological changes. So that once your mind is calm the body becomes calm, and you can think more clearly.
  1. Then engage your thoughts and imagination, by acting out the responses that you do want, in your mind first. By thinking the kind of thoughts about what you want, you then get to feel the feelings that you want to experience. Practice playing positive mind movies (Part 2) which will enable you to create the desired result. Switching over to this new mind movie, whenever your thoughts prompt you to play the fearful disaster movie instead. You have a choice which movie to play, you just need to become aware of it and choose wisely.
  1. The best time to do this, is last thing at night before you drift into sleep, and first thing when you awaken. Your mind is at a very high natural hypnotic state of awareness at these times. It will also work if you take naps during the day, do it before and after them.

Part 15 – Living With Intention

Paula is an Author / Hypnotherapist / Reiki Healer / Artist / Photographer, in Blessington Co. Wicklow. www.i-want-a-better-life.ie / paulaosullivan1@gmail.com / Phone 086 0848398 All her articles to date are on her blog www.paulaosullivan@wordpress.com


Climbing Out of the Abyss – Part 13

April 28, 2015

core beliefs

Core Beliefs

How is your life? Do you find that you begin with the best of intentions to change something, but find yourself at the last minute giving up or sabotaging it? Do you often tell yourself things like ‘I’m worthless, I’m unlovable, I’m not good enough, I’m boring, I’m abnormal, I’m ugly, I’m stupid, I’m undeserving, I’m a bad person etc. etc. ?

If you’re not experiencing life as you’d really like to experience it, you may have acquired some unhelpful core beliefs.

Core beliefs are the deeply held beliefs that influence how we interpret our experiences. They are the lens through which we view life. They will also determine how we behave. An example: A person with a core belief of ‘I’m not good enough’ versus a person with a belief of ‘I am good enough’. You meet a new person and think of asking them to go out for a cuppa. If you are viewing life through the ‘I’m not good enough’ lens, you will probably think ‘ Sure why would they even consider going out with  someone like me, they’d probably prefer someone better looking, more educated etc…’ the resulting behaviour is that you won’t ask the person out, and you’ll continue to feel not good enough. A person looking through the lens of ‘I am good enough’ will have thoughts like ‘Sure it might be fun, what have I got to lose, and if they say no that’s ok, it’s better to be in the company of people who really want to be with me anyway…’ the resulting behaviour is that they will ask the person for a cuppa, and feel good regardless of the outcome.

If you want to change some core beliefs here are a few suggestions.

Keep a thought diary.

A belief is just a thought we keep thinking repeatedly. We form a subconscious agreement in our minds, and this in turn affects our thoughts, our behaviours, and in turn becomes a habit, which affects the decisions and actions we take or don’t take.

Look for the emotion involved, and look for the underlying fear beneath it.

What are you afraid of? This can include the fear of been held accountable if you change, and the thought of being less accountable if you don’t change.

Notice and become aware of where you may be trying to control or influence another person’s behaviour also, as we can only really have control and influence over ourselves.

Become aware of your thoughts that are upsetting you and choose the most dominant one.

On a piece of paper, ask yourself, ‘If this thought were true, what would it mean?

Draw an arrow down to your answer,

Ask ‘Well what’s bad about that’?

Draw an arrow down to your answer,

Ask ‘Well what does that say about me’?

Draw an arrow down to your answer,

Ask ‘Is this true all of the time’?

Draw an arrow down to your answer,

Ask ‘What experiences do I have that show that this belief is not completely true all the time?

Draw an arrow down to your answer,

Ask ‘What would be an appropriate, balanced and helpful core belief?

Look for evidence that things may be different from your upsetting core belief.

If you practice challenging your thoughts regularly, you will change your beliefs.

Part 14 – Overcoming Fear

Paula is an Author/ Hypnotherapist / Reiki Healer / Artist in Blessington Co. Wicklow. www.i-want-a-better-life.ie / paulaosullivan1@gmail.com / Phone 086 0848398 All her articles to date are on her blog www.paulaosullivan@wordpress.com


Climbing Out of the Abyss – Part 12

April 4, 2015

Being Proactive

Proactive

‘Do what you can, with what you have, where you are’ – Theodore Roosevelt (Quote)

There were times in my life when I couldn’t get started to change anything, I was suffering from ‘Perfectionism’. I was waiting for everything to be perfect before I could begin. I could see what needed to change, but I couldn’t imagine the steps to get there, I didn’t feel it was the right time, didn’t have enough money, education etc. It all seemed so overwhelming and impossible, so I would just keep doing what I was doing, over and over again, hoping that something would change. But of course nothing ever did, because how can we expect to get a different result from doing the same old things? We can’t!

To change anything, we must first become aware of where we are, and where we’d like to be and accept the reality (See parts 1 & 6) Then we need to make a plan. A plan is like an oar in a boat, it will help direct you where you want to go. Most of us are like boats without oars, allowing life’s circumstances to direct us all over the place. ‘Between stimulus and response, man has the freedom to choose’ Victor Frankl quote. And we can choose where we want to go in life and how we want to respond to what is happening.

We can act or be acted upon. An example of this was, I found myself in financial difficulty, unable to pay the full mortgage. I could have put my head in the sand and ignored the problem. I would then have been acted upon. Every action or inaction on our behalf has a consequence. I chose to be proactive and approached the bank, yes several times, but I just wouldn’t give up. While I was waiting for them to engage with me, I decided to pay the small amount that I could afford, weekly into my account regardless. I did this religiously for two years, and finally they did come back to me and we now have an arrangement for five years.

We sit around waiting for the magic wand to appear and solve all our problems, which rarely happens. We are a part of the problem and a part of the solution. When I wasn’t earning enough, I started making and selling my jewellery, artwork, writing, photography and I’ve just set up the Blessington Home Enterprise Group Monthly Craft Market.

We need to become aware of the things we can have some control over and focus more on that area, than those that we can’t.

So, what can you do, right now, where you are, with what you have? If you’re in debt, approach the lenders, agree a small amount with each. If you’re in relationship difficulties, talk to the person involved and discuss each other’s needs. If you’re looking for a job consider re training, look at www.skillnets.ie/unemployed, or  www.alison.com, there are hundreds of free courses, I’m doing one myself to upgrade my skills.

Make a plan, set a goal, decide where you want to go, or you’ll just drift any old place. All things are created twice, first in the mind, and then in your reality. Make sure you’re getting the results that you really want to get!

Part 13 – Core Beliefs

Paula is an Author/ Hypnotherapist / Reiki Healer / Artist in Blessington Co. Wicklow. www.i-want-a-better-life.ie / paulaosullivan1@gmail.com / Phone 086 0848398 All her articles to date are on her blog www.paulaosullivan@wordpress.com


Can ‘Love’ be a Verb?

February 10, 2015

Love is a verb

Most of us have been conditioned into believing that ‘Love’ is something external. It just happens to us, we fall in love or someone falls in love with us. We don’t share any sense of responsibility regarding love. It’s a feeling that just takes us over and can leave us just as quickly.

I saw a post on facebook recently that stated, ‘don’t expect people to love you, sure they don’t even love themselves’. Is this true? I suspect in the majority of cases it is.

For me anyway it was kinda like that. My mum told me frequently in the early years how much of a surprise I was to her, she hadn’t been expecting to have any more children, she meant no harm in saying it, but I grew up not feeling wanted, not loved and somewhat abandoned emotionally. My parents didn’t find it easy to express love, they seemed kind of detached. It is said that we will seek what we’ve never had, so I sought love, I sought support, and I sought people who would prove to me that I was wanted. I played the same scenes over and over throughout my life, different faces, but the same disheartening results.

I would arrive at every new relationship armed with wants and needs, a giant gaping void inside my heart looking to be filled, looking to be made complete, looking for someone to give me what I didn’t have myself, but there was always something missing, and I didn’t know what that was.

It wasn’t until my marital relationship of 17 years broke up, that I began to question my beliefs about love.

I realized that I hadn’t viewed ‘Love’ as a verb, an ‘action’ word. I had seen it as something you got from others. Had I been seeking to ‘get’ not ‘give’, all my life? ‘Perhaps if I had brought what I could give, in more abundance, than my expectations of what I could get, would this have changed some of my experiences?’ I asked myself. But I also became aware that in my desperate need for love and acceptance, I had put everyone else’s needs first as I didn’t feel worthy enough to ask for what I wanted.  I still couldn’t be sure, there was still that emptiness, the something missing inside me. Most of us just want to love and be loved in return, we want people to be nice to us, to respect us, to understand us, to support us when we need support. We want to feel wanted, not abandoned in our times of need.

But what if we are not loving ourselves first? What if we don’t support, respect or we abandon ourselves on a regular basis? What if we can’t even keep the promises we make to ourselves, let alone the ones we make to others? Can we really expect others to give us what we don’t already give to ourselves? Are we all just mirroring those unhealed parts of ourselves back and forth with others? And what if we only feel loved if others tell us we are? Is our worth tied up in that ?Then we’re in real trouble I think, you only have to look at the Jesus story to see that, one week people will be celebrating us, the next they’ll be wishing us a speedy demise ! How can any of us really be there for anyone else, if we’re not there for ourselves first?

It was with trying to find answers to these questions that I began to change my views about ‘Love’.

If I wanted to feel loved, I would have to learn how to love myself first. I needed to develop a strong central core of love inside of me, one that didn’t crumble at each rejection. That meant learning to like and accept who I was at that time. It was a difficult process. I had spent 44 years telling myself things like, I was ugly, not worthy of love, and that I was stupid etc. etc. There was nothing I liked about myself. Reading Louise Hay’s book, ‘You can heal your life’ really helped me at that time. She encouraged people to look in a mirror and actually like what they saw, among other deep work. It took me a long time to like and accept who I was. This work is emotionally painful but well worth it. I gradually accepted who I was and had been. I also became aware of aspects of my personality that weren’t serving me or anyone else for the better.

Learning to love yourself is a very transformative process. As you begin to love yourself, you stop and reconsider those things that might harm yourself, or others. You begin to observe your thoughts, your behaviours and your words. I took a personal oath to ‘Do no harm’. I began to see the sacredness of all life, mine and others, human, animal and environmental too. I began to see the effect that I was having on myself and others and I began to live, to think, to speak and to behave more consciously. I found what nourishes the soul.

And no, people didn’t suddenly come rushing into my life to support, love, respect and be there for me, some did, some didn’t, but it didn’t matter anymore, because I was there for myself, I respectfully stopped caring about peoples’ opinions of me, and while I recognised that emotional independence was better that emotional dependence, I still also knew that the best to aim for was emotional interdependence, which is when people are there for each other and themselves at the same time, both giving and receiving freely without conditions or expectations. Both wanting the very best for all concerned, celebrating life, not destroying it. From then on I chose to spend time with people who were living consciously more often than those who weren’t.

So to make Love a verb, I decided to just love. I began to practice listening better (stay with me, I’m a work in progress) I began to try to understand others before I expected to be understood. I sought to see what I could give in every situation rather than what I could get. Instead of looking at how useful people could be to me, I began to see how useful I could be to them instead, in every interaction. In the hope that I could leave others happier and better off than when I found them. A kind word of encouragement, a friendly smile, a genuine compliment. No, not to get anything, not to gain ground or friendship, not to get people to like me, or to be persuasive or manipulative,  and not in a premeditative way, only ever spontaneously, just so that I could practice being loving to all, yes even those who were not nice.

We are all working within the realms and limitations of our current awareness. We are all doing the best we can with what we know, when we know better, we do better. Knowing this, helped me to forgive my parents. They did not know how to love themselves, so they found it difficult to show their love, and they didn’t know how I allowed that to affect me. This also allowed me to practice forgiveness in general and to cut people a bit of slack, are any of us ever fully aware of how we affect others? Those who are in deep emotional pain, who don’t love themselves, are the ones who cause the most distress for others with their words and actions.

When we practice loving, we are there for ourselves first, but not in a selfish way, we consider others, but we nourish ourselves from the well first, before we have enough nourishment in us, to give to others. We don’t feel we’re losing anything in being nice, and  we can be more there for them, with much less resentment. When we love ourselves we can learn discernment, we can set up a healthy emotional bank account that has more deposits than withdrawals, for healthy balanced relationships, as regular attempts are made to meet everyone’s needs. And we can set healthy boundaries and not allow ourselves to be treated in ways that destroy our spirit.

So how can we begin? We must first make some space to get to know ourselves, to be able to watch and observe our thoughts, our actions and to notice the affects they have on ourselves and others. Create a sacred space or sacred time that’s just yours. Go out into nature, go into a room by yourself, or go to bed earlier or later than others to find that quiet time. Place your hands over your heart centre, the centre of your chest, close your eyes and breathe in and out slowly and deeply for a while, until you feel a measure of peace, and ask yourself, ‘How can I love myself and others more?’

I also found this very powerful visualization to help you put things into perspective. Close your eyes, breathe deeply a few times. Now imagine you are at the end of your life, you have one hour left to contemplate all that has brought you to this point. If you had the time over again, what would you do differently? How would you have treated the ones you loved? What would have said, that you didn’t say? What would you have liked to do in your life that you didn’t do? What regrets do you have?

Now open your eyes, you’re still here, you’re still alive, that last hour may be nearer than you think. You now have a chance to change what you will be thinking about at the end of your life, when it does come. What will you do differently from now on?

The answers may surprise you!


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